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10 GUIDELINES FOR RAISING
A WELL-BEHAVED CHILD
Whenever possible, teach rather than punish. The goal of discipline is
to teach children acceptable behavior. Hitting children does not teach
acceptable behavior. It teaches children that "might makes right" and
hitting is a way to solve problems.
View childrenís misbehavior as a mistake in judgement. It will be easier to think of ways to teach more acceptable behavior.
Whenever possible, make consequences relate to misbehavior. If a child
makes a mess, he/she should clean it up.
Have behavior rules but make sure they are few in number, reasonable,
and appropriate to the childís age and development.
Make sure that consequences for misbehavior are reasonable and clear.
Donít argue or nag children about rules. If a rule is broken, remind the child of the rule and the consequence for not following the rule. When you give a command, speak in a firm voice and repeat the command.
If your child has many behaviors which concern you, donít try to change
all of them at once. Choose one behavior of concern. Explain why the
behavior is a problem, provide consequences for misbehavior and praise the behavior opposite of the misbehavior when your child demonstrates it.
- Very Important: Distract infants and toddlers when they are doing something you donít like or remove them from the situation. Infants and toddlers do not understand right and wrong and should not be hit or shaken.
Use good manners when talking to children about their behavior. Be sure
to use "Iím sorry", "May I?" and "Excuse me" when they are appropriate. Be a good model for your children in your speech and actions.
- BEST OF ALL: Catch your child being good! Your praise will
increase appropriate behavior. A hug, smile and soft words can also show approval.
Center for Effective Discipline
155 W. Main Street #100-B
Columbus, OH 43215
If you would like more information, please go to this site to read or print out a FREE e-booklet entitled:
"28 WAYS TO TEACH NON-VIOLENCE, KINDNESS AND PEACEFULNESS
EPOCH-USA is the American affiliate of EPOCH-WORLDWIDE, a multinational
federation committed to ending corporal punishment of children through
education and legal reforms. EPOCH was founded in 1989 in England by Peter
Newell and Dr. Penelope Leach. EPOCH-USA is a program of the Center for
Effective Discipline, a not-for-profit organization which is also the
headquarters for the National Coalition to Abolish Corporal Punishment in